“Stupidest Thing of the Year” Race is Still Too Close to Call

The race to decide the August entry in the First Annual Stupidest Thing of the Year competition is growing closer as one candidate removed himself from contention by copping to a plea bargain with Federal prosecutors, another candidate made yet another stupid statement, and a host of new contenders for the title emerged from the sidelines.

This week’s update d list of contenders includes:

Michael Vick, the soon-to-be former quarterback of the Atlanta Falcons, accepted a plea bargain negotiated by his attorneys and Federal prosecutors. Vick, by having done the smart thing by copping a plea, is removed from contention for the month of August.

New Mexico Governor and Democratic Presidential hopeful Bill Richardson has strengthened his position in this month’s competition. At a forum with gay rights activists Richardson replied “It’s a choice…” when asked if he believed people were “born” gay. Immediately, the governor attempted to cover this breach of political correctness by adding “you know, I’m not a scientist…”

 

Governor Richardson also appeared to prove that he definitely isn’t a political scientist by admitting that “I screwed up…” when he named arch-conservative Byron White as a model for future Supreme Court justices.

 

Another Democratic Presidential hopeful, Sen. Barrack Obama of Illinois, has emerged as a contender. At a campaign appearance in Virginia he said that, as a result of a springtime tornado in Kansas “… ten thousand people died … an entire town was destroyed …” According to news reports, the actual number of fatalities was 12.

 

Apparently not wishing to concede the race for this month’s winner, the pack of howling wolves known as several Republican Presidential nominee-wannabes are now vigorous contenders.

 

Former Massachusetts Governor Mitt Romney, in an attempt to explain why none of his 5 sons had enlisted in the military, said “… one of the ways my sons are showing support for our nation is helping me get elected…” He later claimed that he had “misspoke.”

 

Former New York Mayor Rudolph Giuliani claimed that, following the 9-11 attacks, he was at Ground Zero “… as often, if not more, than most of the workers …” and was thus exposed to the same health risks. He later admitted that “I could have said that better … What I was saying was that ‘I’m her with you’”

With a week to go in this month’s competition, it’s still a wide-open race.

This Week’s Most Misleading Headline

“‘Dangerous’ Dean Poised to Hit Mexico”

The above headline referred to a hurricane named Dean and not to former Democratic presidential hopeful Howard Dean.

In a related incident, Mexican President Felipe Calderón cut short his Canadian summit talks with Prime Minister Stephen Harper and US President George Bush in order to return to Mexico to personally assess and monitor relief efforts in regions that would be hit by Hurricane Dean. The storm has thus entered the record book as the only hurricane that has caused a Mexican national to return home.