Archive for the ‘criminal stupidity’ Category

Hsu, Simpson are Favorites in September “Stupidest Thing” Contest

September 18, 2007

With less than two weeks remaining the September “Stupidest Thing” competition is shaping up as a 2-man race.  The candidates are:

Norman Hsu:  After skipping out on a $2 million bail bond, Hsu was the early favorite after being arrested in a Colorado hospital by the FBI on the same day that he was to appear in court for a hearing on whether the $2 million bail should be reduced to $1 million.


Hsu is currently under guard at that hospital after a federal magistrate set bond at $5 million.

One might think that Hsu’s stupidity would be hard to top and, normally, that would be the case.  But a strong challenge is being mounted by the second nominee.

O.J. Simpson:  If you were to look up the word “stupidity” in the encyclopedia you would find O.J.’s picture at the top of the page!  Here is a man who:


1. Barges into a Las Vegas hotel room with the intent of “recovering” sports memorabilia that he claimed were stolen from him.  With him he brings along 5 other people, two of which were allegedly carrying pistols.


2. Was questioned by the Las Vegas police the morning after the incident.


3. Made numerous statements to the press in which he denied any involvement in the incident.


4. Didn’t leave town when he had the opportunity and was thus arrested on an armed robbery charge.  O.J. is now being held without bail in the Clarke County, Nevada jail.

These two clowns are proof that some people need to be removed from the gene pool!  All Hsu had to do was show up in court and then, even if his bail wasn’t reduced, he could have left town and no one would have been the wiser for months.  Maybe it had something to do with the fact that he would have been ordered to turn over his passport to the court?

As for Simpson, what can I say about him that hasn’t already been said?  He’s lucky that stupidity isn’t a crime because, if it was, he would be so far back in the slammer that he would be playing chess with the Unibomber!

Stay tuned because if anyone beats these two, it will be the greatest comeback since Napoleon escaped from Elba.


Titans of Stupidity: O.J. Simpson

September 14, 2007

As I’ve often said, there is stupidity and then there is stupidity of Biblical proportions.  As an example of the latter I offer, for your consideration, the actions of O.J. Simpson.

Here is a man who, over the past 12 years, has:

  1. Been charged with two counts of murder and, even though there was more evidence against him than there was against Lee Harvey Oswald, beat the charges and walked free.
  2. After losing a civil rights lawsuit brought by the families of his alleged victims declared bankruptcy.
  3. Although he had declared himself bankrupt, traveled all over the country to play golf and generally enjoy life.
  4. Wrote a book about the above-mentioned murder entitled If I Did It. The book was withdrawn after it caused a storm of public outrage.
  5. Allegedly stormed into a Las Vegas hotel room with 4 or 5 other men, two of which were armed with pistols, and removed sports memorabilia items that he claimed were his.

Let us examine the above actions in more detail.

As to item 1, no one has ever explained how blood stains from the two alleged victims was on found on Simpson’s driveway and on his clothes.  Since the crime scene was several miles away it is unlikely that the victims, after receiving multiple stab wounds, walked over to Simpson’s home in order to leave bloodstains and a pair of blood-soaked gloves that the LA Police Department would later use to “frame” him.

In a civil trial Simpson was declared to have “violated the civil rights” of the victims.  After the jury in that case awarded the victims’ families multi-millions of dollars in damages, Simpson declared bankruptcy.

Despite supposedly having no financial assets, Simpson continued to live quite comfortably in both California and in Florida.  Thanks to legal maneuvering and sidesteps, Simpson’s property was protected from seizure related to the damages previously awarded in the civil rights case.

In a move that was probably due to an over-inflated ego and colossal stupidity, Simpson wrote a book entitled If I Did It in which he provided a detailed “hypothetical” account of the above-mentioned murders (including details that were not introduced into evidence during either the murder or the civil rights trials). 

Even though the book’s publisher withdrew it from the market after a tsunami of public outrage, the victim’s families had the book reissued under a new title: I Did It.  Simpson will not share in the royalties generated by the book.

And now let us review the grand finale.

Simpson, and four or five others, allegedly forced their way into a Las Vegas, NV hotel room to recover items that Simpson claimed were his personal property. Since (again according to news reports) two of these men were brandishing pistols, a minor dispute over property mushroomed into a potential armed robbery felony rap.

And finally, Simpson’s alleged foray into armed robbery had the misfortune to occur on what had been a slow news day for both the Fox News Channel as well as CNN.  The resulting news coverage, in contrast to the jury at Simpson’s murder trial, took less than an hour to find Simpson guilty of stupidity with criminal intent.

If stupidity was a capital offense O.J. Simpson would have been drawn and quartered years ago.